Losing Interest in Your Long Distance Relationship – What to Do? 

Photo of author
By Jesse
Last Updated:

Reignite the spark in your LDR with our guide on what to do when you start losing interest. Act now!

Losing Interest in Your Long Distance Relationship

Long-distance relationships come with their own set of unique challenges that couples need to overcome to survive.

The lack of physical intimacy, constant waiting, shaky trust, and insatiable hunger for quality time are some of the recurring setbacks LDR lovers face. 

As someone who’s done their fair share of long-distance dating, I know how hard it is to stay together with all those miles and time zones keeping you apart. 

Every time my partner had the slightest change in mood, I would wonder if that was one of the signs he was losing interest in our long-distance relationship.

We eventually moved in together and started a family, but that’s our story. 

Let’s figure out if you want out of your LDR or still want to fight for your love!

10 Signs You Are Losing Interest in Your Long-Distance Partner 

Signs You Are Losing Interest in Your Long-Distance Partner

You’ve been doing long-distance for a while, and things are not the same as before? Your conversations have run dry, and the camera is not doing it for you under the sheets anymore.

Is it just a rough patch you’ve hit, or are you losing interest in your long-distance relationship?

1. You Don’t Communicate as Often

One of the first signs you are losing interest in your LDR partner is the lack of communication. When picking up the phone or sending a “Good morning” message feels more like a chore than a pleasure, there is a good chance you are growing distant. 

But before you jump to any conclusions, make sure your partner is not actually busy or going through a rough patch. They might have a good explanation for going radio silent.

2. You Lack Enthusiasm in Conversations

If your partner’s veining interest becomes noticeable and they avoid communicating with you, we’d suggest you address this problem as soon as possible. 

Even though they might have a perfectly good reason for not having the energy to talk or share their day-to-day life with you, it usually happens when their focus shifts from your relationship. 

3. No More Effort to Spend Time Together

You used to spend every spare minute video calling or texting every detail of your day, but lately, it seems like they’ve been making excuses to stay away from you. That is one of the signs your long-distance girlfriend is losing interest.

Things have changed, but you need to find the reason behind their behavior. Are they losing interest in the relationship, or is something else causing the shift?

4. No Expression of Affection or Love

You no longer need to shower them with love and affection. Your phone calls don’t end with “I love you” or “I can’t wait to be with you.” Their absence doesn’t cause you pain anymore. 

So, you probably think, “Am I losing feelings for my long-distance boyfriend (girlfriend)?” The answer is probably Yes, and that’s okay. Relationships come and go, and if this is the case, it’s better to address the issue sooner rather than later.

5. No More Plans for Your Future Together

Long-distance relationships can only work if you see yourselves together in the future. You don’t necessarily have to share a roof and start a family in the next six months. It could be years before you build your home. This is often what kills a long-distance relationship.

But if you no longer feel excited and you’ve stopped making plans for the future, you need to ask yourself if this relationship is what you want.

6. You Don’t Share the Same Values and Life Goals

The integrity of a couple greatly relies on sharing the goals and values in life. Being on the same page regarding important topics like family, religion, finances, and having children can make or break a long-distance relationship. 

If you and your partner cannot find a middle ground regarding the most basic things, how do you expect to withstand all life’s challenges that everyone faces sooner or later?

Taking two separate paths in life is fine, but the sooner you realize and accept the truth, the less hurt and pain you’ll go through. 

7. You Feel More Disconnected and Distant

They say, “out of sight, out of mind,” and they are not wrong. Time and space take a toll on all relationships, especially long-distance ones. 

The lack of Intimacy and physical contact is one of the biggest challenges LDR couples face daily. Living at two different locations (and sometimes in different time zones) means that you and your partner lead separate lives.  

And despite all the technology we now have, bridging the gap and bringing your worlds together sometimes gets too hard. 

8. Your Partner’s Needs or Feelings Don’t Affect You

This one is quite worrying. Caring about what your partner needs or how they feel are some of the first signs of love. 

The moment you become “immune” to their love and affection, chances are you no longer want to be romantically involved with them. 

Supposedly you still care for them as friends or humans, and now would be the perfect time to come clean and save them unnecessary suffering.

9. Your Partner Is Not Your Priority

Long-distance relationships are stressful enough to begin with. They have to jump hurdles that regular couples never will, like, for example, the way they manage their time. 

Unfortunately, life happens, and other things (or people) sometimes take priority. If you can’t find a good enough reason to spend quality time with your LDR partner, your priorities might have changed without you being aware of it. 

10. You Are Not Open or Honest With Your Partner About Your Feelings

Look, the honeymoon phase is sweet but short. Things will change over time, and that’s normal. However, hiding how you feel about your long-distance relationship is something else. 

Maybe you got tired of the wait or realized LDRs are not your cup of tea. Maybe you miss them too much and can’t deal with the pain. 

A solid relationship should be your safe haven, the place you go when you feel uncertain about anything, including your feelings. If you can’t confide in your partner, chances are you’ve lost trust, which is a massive sign of a veining interest. 

How to Avoid Losing Feelings in Your Long-Distance Relationship

How to Avoid Losing Feelings in Your Long-Distance Relationship

You are going through a dry spell but still in love and care for one another? 

Don’t worry; there is always hope! It only takes a little work, but anything for love, right? 

Let’s see what you can do to relight the fire in your long-distance relationship: 

Schedule Regular Calls and Visits

Long-distance couples report that not being physically present in each other’s lives is the most difficult part of dating remotely. 

And while nothing can substitute physical intimacy, modern technology allows us to stay in touch anytime. 

Schedule regular calls, text each other “Good Morning” messages, stream and watch a LDR movie together, and play online games… what you do is less important than clearing out your schedule to spend quality time with your loved one. 

Take the Time to Share Your Emotions With Each Other

I hear so many guys say, “My long-distance girlfriend is being distant.” But are you sure you are not acting the same way?

Every LDR couple is different. They cope with the distance in their own way. Some overshare their emotions, and others prefer to keep them at bay. 

Maybe the key to your romantic success lies somewhere in the middle. Don’t overwhelm each other, but if you miss them, tell them. If you want to kiss them, tell them. It’s that simple! 

Send Each Other Special Gifts or Handwritten Letters

When you can’t fly across the world whenever you miss your long-distance boyfriend or girlfriend, simply send them a token of your love. 

A handwritten letter is an easiest and cheapest way to put a smile on your loved one. Plus, being so old-fashioned makes the gesture much more romantic. 

Even if you can’t be there for their birthday, you can still have a cake and an LDR gift delivered. At least today, it’s easy with the help of technology. 

Express Your Love for Each Other

Tell your partner how much you love and miss them. They probably feel the same about you. 

When you can’t hold each other tight, at least you can shower each other with love and affection. It’s the best way to show your dedication and commitment to your partner, especially with all those miles keeping you apart.

Try to Make the Most of Your Conversations

Effective communication is the cornerstone of every relationship. Still, it plays an even more important role in the success of long-distance ones. 

Texting and video calls are a regular part of LDR couples’ day-to-day living. So use this time wisely to strengthen your trust and bond. 

Find Unique Ways to Have Fun Together

Yes, long-distance relationships can be hard to manage, but they are also fun and unique. You just need to find ways to bridge the distance and have fun together. 

LDR couples have nothing to complain about. Thanks to modern technology and LDR gadgets, there is so much you can do, and never run out of fun activities. 

Plan your next trip, send each other love mail, stream movies together, play online board games, have a cookout, or even organize scavenger hunts for each other.

To keep the spark burning, you can still take your loved one out for dinner or organize one at your home. Set the mood with a nice tune, light candles, order some nice food and jump on a video call. You can always move this date to the bedroom if things heat up. 

Set Expectations and Talk

You need to be open about what you expect from this relationship and figure out whether you and your long-distance partner are on the same page. 

If you want to see him/her more often, be clear about when and how. If they need more time to focus on work/studies, try to show understanding.

And most importantly, talk about the future and if you see yourselves together down the line.

Can You Save Your Long-Distance Relationship?

Do people lose feelings for their long-distance partners? Absolutely – just like in any other regular relationship. 

You get busy, distracted, and focus on everything else but the one you love. And then life throws you a couple of curve balls, and you need to jump a few hurdles.

But no matter how hard things get, you probably already know where this is going, at least on your end.

You know if this relationship feels real enough for you to kill the distance or if it has run its course. 

jesse blogger at my long distance love


I'm Jesse, your long-distance relationship expert. I share tips and advice on my blog to help you navigate the ups and downs of long-distance love. Whether you're just starting out or have been apart for years, my blog is here to help you stay connected and happy despite the distance.