Questions to Ask Yourself Before Dating a Foreigner
Dating a foreign person is exciting. As you have your online chats or face to face conversations, you don’t only know more about who the person is and what he or she likes. You also learn more about the person’s culture, country, and way of life. All of these can be exhilarating and refreshing because it is all new. However, you need to remember that dating a foreign person doesn’t come without challenges.
Before Dating a Foreign Person, You Have to Consider the Following
Dating a foreigner has its downs, just like any other relationship. In most cases, it involves communicating through the internet while being in a long-distance relationship. It could be worth it, but we all know that it requires a lot of work for the relationship to become successful. Before you jump into this situation, it’s best to ask yourself the following questions for you to be certain that you’re ready:
1. Am I emotionally ready to date someone who isn’t with me physically?
The longing you will feel will be great. I once dated someone from New York. We were already friends before he left my city for the Big Apple. When his family migrated, we began talking online, and then pursued an online relationship. When we were still a couple, we always wished that we got into a relationship before he left because the longing to be with each other was too great.
2. Will the communication barrier be a big deal?
Communication is a big deal when you are in a long-distance relationship. It would be great if you can both speak English fluently. However, there will still be misunderstandings, especially if English isn’t the first language for you both. You need to figure out if you have enough patience when this happens.
3. Am I ready to stand up for our relationship?
Whether you like it or not, there will be those who will blatantly show how they dislike you dating a foreign person. On your date’s side, it is probably the same. I remember when I first started going out with a gentleman named John. He was great, but his family wasn’t too keen on him dating a Latina woman. Eventually, John caved in, and we went our separate ways.
4. Can I keep up with the communication needs of this relationship?
One of the hardest parts of dating a foreigner and being in a long-distance relationship is the timing. Everything can get screwed up easily when you have different time zones. It would be a total disaster if your morning time would be your date’s night time. One has to sacrifice and compromise to maintain good communication.
5. Financially, is it possible for us to visit each other?
If neither of you in a relationship is financially capable of visiting each other, it’s going to be even more challenging. Yes, it’s possible to save up, but saving requires time. For you, that’s time lost. If you had the means financially, you would be able to book a plane ticket anytime and go.
6. Will I be able to get over my trust issue?
Let’s be honest. We hold some baggage from the previous relationships we’ve had. We take the baggage with us wherever we go. If one of your issues is about trust, then you have to know that your suspicious way of thinking will worsen when you are in a long-distance relationship. You won’t be able to see your partner 24/7. With trust issues, you have this feeling that your partner is lying in some way even though the person isn’t. Would you be able to get over this?
7. Will we have the same level of commitment to make the relationship work?
Lastly, let’s talk about how committed you and your future date are going to be. Do you remember the guy from New York I told you about earlier? We weren’t really on the same page when it came to commitment. He wanted to focus on his art and career, while I was trying to make things work. It was like I was investing 100% while he only put in about 50% (the other 50% goes to his career). I became frustrated, and I felt neglected. As you may have guessed, it did not work out at all.
The problem with most of us is that we jump into dating a foreign person with the wrong perspective. When the challenges arrive, we are not equipped to handle any of them because we went into a situation that we thought would be easy and problem free. We usually focus too much on the lovey-dovey stuff that we fail to see and prepare ourselves for the difficulties to come.