6 Deadly Things That Kill Long-Distance Relationships

Photo of author
By Jesse
Last Updated:

Understand what can kill a long-distance relationship! Our comprehensive guide explores common hurdles, lack of trust, and solutions for a lasting connection.

what kills long distance relationships

In a world replete with instantaneous communication and endless possibilities for connection, long-distance relationships are more common than ever before. But that doesn’t make them any less challenging.

As someone involved in a long-distance relationship, it’s imperative you understand the hurdles that can lead to the demise of such connections. Not to foster fear, but to arm yourself with the knowledge needed to nurture your relationship and keep love blossoming, no matter the miles that lay between you and your partner.

So, what are the things that potentially kill long-distance relationships?

Lack of Communication Will Kill Your LDR

Signs You Are Losing Interest in Your Long-Distance Partner

At the heart of every relationship, whether co-located or thousands of miles apart, lies communication. Communication is what makes or breaks a relationship. In a long-distance relationship, the importance of effective communication is amplified. It bridges the physical distance and keeps you connected on an emotional level – a lifeline of sorts. However, if there is a lack of communication, it can kill the long-distance relationship. Distance can widen, emotionally and mentally, making you feel away from your partner.

You don’t have to be in touch every second of the day. But staying in regular contact, sharing your daily triumphs and challenges, and expressing your feelings can make your partner feel loved. When you stop communicating effectively, misunderstandings can creep in. You may start to feel disconnected, fostering feelings of loneliness and alienation – which are common long-distance relationship problems that often end relationships.

Have you noticed signs your partner is losing interest in the long-distance relationship? and boredom is seeping in due to the distance? Or are you taking each other for granted?

Lack of Trust

Trust is the bedrock that can make a relationship or relationship killer if not present. Trust is particularly crucial in a long-distance relationship. The lack of physical proximity can amplify insecurities and doubts, threatening the stability of the relationship. These trust issues can be a consequence of past experiences or can stem from the inherent uncertainty that distance brings.

Regardless of their root cause, trust issues pose a significant challenge to the survival of long-distance relationships. It can lead to overthinking, misconstrued assumptions, and emotional turmoil. The fear that your partner will betray your trust can lead to unhealthy behaviors like constant checking, excessive calls, or jealous outbursts – the kind of behaviors that tend to make individuals in long-distance relationships call it quits.

To counteract this, it’s essential to build a foundation of trust in a long-distance relationship. This is achieved through demonstrating reliability, honesty, and transparency. Make sure to be present for your scheduled phone calls and be open about your feelings and experiences. Remember to talk to your partner about any concerns you have to avoid any rift in the relationship.

Absence of Shared Experiences

Shared experiences form the glue that bonds people together. They provide a common ground and create memories that can be looked back upon with fondness. In a long-distance relationship, opportunities for shared experiences are naturally limited by the physical distance. This lack of shared experiences is one of the things that kills long-distance relationships.

However, this does not mean it’s impossible to create shared experiences. With a bit of creativity, you can have ‘online dates’, watch movies together virtually, or engage in multiplayer video games. Spend quality time with your partner even if the relationship is geographically distant. If these efforts are not made and the relationship becomes a series of monotonous phone calls, it may fizzle out over time. And remember, distance makes the heart grow fonder only when we are actively trying to keep the relationship alive.

Lack of Future Planning

How to Avoid Losing Feelings in Your Long-Distance Relationship

A long-distance relationship cannot endure indefinitely. There needs to be a plan for when the partners will finally live in the same geographic location. Without a shared vision of the future, the relationship can feel like it’s stuck in limbo and may eventually fall out of love.

Discussing the future can be daunting. It may require making significant life changes or sacrifices. But without this conversation, doubts and insecurities may rear their ugly heads. The uncertainty about the future can cast a long shadow over the present, leading to frustration and a feeling of hopelessness that can poison the relationship.

Unmet Expectations

Every person enters a relationship with a set of expectations. These expectations may pertain to the frequency of communication in a LDR, expressions of love, or commitment levels. If these expectations are not communicated and met, it can lead to dissatisfaction and resentment, often causing long-distance couples to call it quits in a long-distance relationship.

In a long-distance relationship, it’s crucial to have clear and open conversations about what each partner expects from the other. Remember, assumptions are the termites of relationships. By proactively discussing expectations, you can avoid misunderstandings and ensure that both partners feel valued and loved.

Emotional and Physical Needs Not Being Met

We crave emotional closeness and physical intimacy. Long-distance relationships, by their very nature, can make meeting these needs challenging. It’s seen that couples in long-distance relationships often struggle with these challenges.

If your emotional and physical needs are not being met, it can lead to feelings of loneliness and dissatisfaction. Even if you love your partner deeply, these unfulfilled needs can create a strain on the relationship. Meeting your partner in person whenever you get a chance to meet can help mitigate this.

To navigate this issue, it’s important to have open and honest discussions about your needs. Explore ways to create emotional intimacy remotely and discuss how to handle physical needs. As a couple in a long-distance relationship, these are some long distance relationship problems that couples face and overcoming them will help you last without seeing each other for longer periods.

If you need some help, this article teaches you how to stay emotionally connected in a long-distance relationship.

The Role of Physical Intimacy in Long-Distance Relationships

3 Harsh Facts About Long-Distance Relationships

Physical intimacy is a fundamental human need. It’s a way we express love, connection, and shared understanding. In a long-distance relationship, the lack of physical intimacy can be a significant hurdle. The inability to share a hug, a kiss, or simply hold hands can leave a void that phone calls and video chats can’t fill.

This lack of physical contact can lead to dissatisfaction, loneliness, and a feeling of disconnect. While emotional connection is paramount, the absence of physical intimacy can strain the relationship. Despite a deep love for your partner, these unmet needs can create tension and feelings of discontent.

To overcome this, it’s essential to discuss how you will handle the lack of physical intimacy. Find creative ways to express your love, such as sending thoughtful gifts or love letters. Planning regular visits can also provide something to look forward to and help endure the periods of separation. If the distance becomes too much, then the relationship might be coming to an end, and it might be time to save the relationship by making an effort to make it work.

While long-distance relationships can be a challenge, understanding these potential pitfalls can help you navigate the terrain more successfully. So remember, communication, trust, shared experiences, future planning, setting expectations, and meeting emotional and physical needs are the key components to maintaining a healthy long-distance relationship. Don’t let the boundaries of the relationship restrain you; rather, express your feelings and needs, and put your relationship above everything.

If you need some help, this article teaches you how to stay emotionally connected in a long-distance relationship and how to keep your long-distance relationships from falling out of love.

Reasons Long-Distance Relationships Fail: A Conclusion

Long-distance relationships, or LDRs, can be a challenging yet rewarding venture. Understanding what kills long distance relationships, what may end the relationship or even kill the relationship, can provide the insight needed to navigate the trials that come with the territory.

Key issues such as lack of communication, trust issues, absence of shared experiences, lack of future planning, unmet expectations, and the struggle to maintain physical intimacy are common reasons why long-distance relationships don’t always work. These issues can make the relationship feel like a burden, leading to the feeling that the relationship is killing one’s spirit. This could result in a situation where long distance relationships fail, or even lead to infidelity, where a partner may look outside of their relationship to fill the gaps. Boredom in relationships is a common issue that can make you feel sad or don’t feel like putting effort in anymore.

Video call sessions, which add a sense of togetherness, may work as a band-aid solution for the absence of physical intimacy but communication is not always enough, and it can’t entirely replace the ‘want to hold’ or ‘miss your partner’ feelings that people involved in long-distance and geographically close relationships experience. These are often the most asked questions or concerns regarding LDRs.

On the other hand, these challenges, including problems in a long-distance relationship like feeling like you’re starting to drift apart or get busy with every other person, may seem daunting, but they can be navigated successfully with open communication, honesty, and trust. You must trust your partner, understand your partner’s needs, and consider each other’s feelings. This approach can make the relationship resilient and even strengthen your bond.

By being proactive and addressing these potential pitfalls head-on, you can foster a long-distance relationship that doesn’t just survive but thrives. So, the next time you find yourself wondering why some long-distance relationships fail, remember these points and use them as a guide to keep your relationship resilient, fulfilling, and strong, no matter the miles that separate you. After all, love knows no distance. These are the harsh facts about long-distance relationships to keep in mind, but also remember that relationships tend to evolve, and when a relationship ends, it doesn’t necessarily mean it was a failure.

jesse blogger at my long distance love


I'm Jesse, your long-distance relationship expert. I share tips and advice on my blog to help you navigate the ups and downs of long-distance love. Whether you're just starting out or have been apart for years, my blog is here to help you stay connected and happy despite the distance.